Just Engaged? Tips On What Happens Next
You're madly in love, your other half has just proposed and you've just said yes. Take a moment, because this is happiness personified right here. And before you post a ring selfie on Instagram or start creating Pinterest boards, take a read through these tips on some steps for what happens next...
Pause and Be Present
Before you rush to share the news with friends and family, pause for a few hours (or better yet, an entire day or night) savoring this sweet moment with your other half.
Share the Good News
When the time feels sweet to share this exciting news with friends and family, be sure to begin with you "innermost family" (whether they be family by blood, or the friends we choose as family) and work your way out from there. Resist the urge to share anything on social media until you've had the chance to speak to all your significant people, personally.
If you're lucky enough to have all your nearest and dearest in one place throwing a surprise engagement party can be a wonderful way to announce your engagement to everyone all at once! If you've already shared the news, parents may host and help plan the celebration. Either way, keep in mind that usually an invitation to the engagement party leads to expectations of an invitation to the wedding. So if you're not planning on inviting the whole engagement party gathering, it might save some heartache later if you and your partner find a way to mention this, on the night. A good solution is giving a quick speech and mentioning that as you're planning a more intimate wedding, you're particularly thrilled to be able to celebrate with so many people on this night.
...for the dozens of questions coming your way! As soon as you announce your engagement you can expect to be answering on a regular basis these and many others: Have you set a date? How did they propose? Where are you thinking for the wedding? Will I be in the wedding party? Take a moment to think these things through before giving out any answers. A gracious response? "We're just basking in this 'newly engaged' feeling for now. We promised ourselves and each other we'd cherish this for a few months before diving in with any wedding planning."
Meet The Parents
Unless their parents live on the other side of the world, we're assuming that if you're planning to marry their offspring, you have already met the parents of your partner. If not, this is a great opportunity to get everyone together. You plan on spending the rest of your lives together so laying good relationship energy makes for only good things down the track. Plus, there will be shared costs and conversations around planning.
Insure Your Ring
Have the jewel evaluated by an objective party and take out adequate insurance checking whether you're covered for loss, theft, or damage. This can be added to your home and contents insurance. If you don't have it, now is the perfect time to take that first step together.
Set A Budget
Once you're ready to begin planning, this is absolutely the first step, before you do anything. Because your budget informs pretty much every decision to follow, including the scope of your guest list, which in turn, informs your venue choices.
Draft Your Guest List
This can be a major source of tension and contention. Many couples struggle through this step and it can prove the first argument obstacle in wedding planning. This is often due to serious pressure from one or both sets of parents, and nuclear missile size expectations being launched and projected on all sides. Take a deep breath and try to fin middle ground. At the very least you and your partner need to be on the same page, even if that's not the same page as the parents. A good test for culling a few extras? Ask yourself two questions: Have we spent time with this person socially in the past 12 months? Will we still be friends with this person in 20 years? Whether you apply this reasoning to friends or to extended family, it's a pretty good indication of whether this person holds meaningful space in your life or not.